I haven't posted in a long time. I could say I felt bad, or that I was sorry, but we'd all know it was a lie. The lie would lead to an awkward silence that I'd try to alleviate with some sort of terrible joke or a pun and then maybe you'd laugh a little, but it would be polite laughter. Please don't polite laugh for my sake. It will only leave us both feeling empty and alone.
My dearest Blog, during our time apart I've contemplated many things. Things like, “Why does all Greek yogurt taste like lemons?” and “Why couldn't Mulder and Scully just MAKE IT WORK GOD DAMMIT?!?!?!”, but I have also contemplated you and your future. You were started as a companion to a weight loss challenge, and now I'm at a loss over what I should do with you. The challenges are over, and my ability/desire to diet is circling the drain. I thought about just getting rid of you but I couldn't do it. The thought actually made me a little anxious and sad. Leave it to me to form an emotional connection to something that isn't even real.
So it was decided that I would not be able to delete you or, as I like to think of it, murder you in cold blood. What now? I've been reading other blogs for inspiration. Maybe I could get you up and running again, like in the beginning when I was posting consistently and accomplishing things. Maybe it wouldn't have to be all about weight loss, or really any one particular thing, maybe it could just be a dumping ground for the toxic waste of my brain. Is that a little dramatic? Maybe it could just be my place to tell stories and entertain myself, and possibly other people if they cared enough to read it. And even if they didn't, fuck them! I don't need their approval. I'm my own person, a lone kangaroo** roaming wild and free.
I'm going to give it a try. So prepare yourself for some changes around here.
** During a recent conversation about sexual fetishism Boyfriend asked me what animal I would be if I was a Furry (Google it), and it occurred to me that my animal most definitely would have to be a kangaroo. Don't ask me why, you don't want to know.